Re-evaluating Your Holiday Traditions

Traditions are important to families. They reinforce meanings in life, bind us together and provide continuity of the past and present. It’s fun to pass down traditions we remember from our own childhood to our children and grandchildren.


In our busy world, however, it’s not always realistic to continue some traditions. If an old family tradition doesn’t work for your family anymore, recognize the need for change. Engage your family in the process of setting up new traditions that you can each participate in and enjoy together. Establish your own traditions while keeping the customs that mean the most to you.

Make a list of your traditional holiday preparations – from holiday greeting cards, gift exchanges, holiday meal preparation, to decorating and “clean up and take down” day.

Then gather your family together and ask what is important to each of them and see if they are willing to help continue that tradition. All family members must “buy into” the activities and at least lend a helping hand if not completely take over a task.

If a tradition has become unimportant to you, or not worth the time, energy and money you would spend on it, feel free to cross it off your list – at least for this year. You can re-evaluate it later.

Pare down your to-do list and write names of the people who will take responsibility or help out. Break large projects into several smaller steps. Then use good organizational and time management techniques to plan ahead, delegate or accomplish tasks necessary for each holiday tradition.

Honey and Infants

Many people find it difficult to resist the sweet taste of honey. New research shows it even contains antioxidants and other health-promoting compounds. But honey isn’t for everyone. In fact, feeding honey to infants less than 12 months old may have severe and sometimes deadly consequences.

While is may seem harmless to add a little bit of honey to your child’s pacifier, honey often contains spores of bacterium that causes infant botulism. Although these bacterial spores do not affect the digestive systems of adults, an infant’s digestive system is not fully developed, and can’t prevent the spores from germinating. When this happens, the bacteria produce a toxin that is often fatal.

Botulism toxin affects the neuromuscular system, leading to a weak and lethargic baby. An infected infant will first experience constipation, followed by a weak cry, poor feeding and sucking ability, droopy eyelids, and overall weakness. Noticing these warning signs and seeking medical attention is the best way to ensure a safe recovery if the baby is infected.

The most important thing to remember is that infant botulism is preventable. You can keep your baby safe by NOT feeding your baby honey, even in baked goods, and keeping honey away from your baby’s pacifier, water and medications. Once the infant is over 12 months old, you can relax and allow your little one some honey.

Setting Limits and Standing Firm

A toddler needs to learn quite early that he or she should not go beyond the fence or touch the hot stove. A teenager needs to have a reasonable, yet caring and protective curfew. Setting clear limits for children and teens can not only keep them save, but can help to give them boundaries for acceptable behavior.

Limits are at the foundation of parenting responsibility. They protect youth from physical and psychological harm, protect property, and promote respect for others. Limits also give children a sense of security. And usually, they like knowing an adult is in control.

It’s wise to keep the number of limits or rule to the ones that really count. It is important to set limits, but also allow children the opportunity to choose. Giving them a choice when you can, helps them develop independence, confidence and a sense of accountability for their actions.

Expecting too much can lower a child’s self-esteem and cause stress in your child. Parents should use limits consistently so children aren’t likely to get confused. Of course, as children grow older, their limits should change to reflect their developmental stage. In fact, as children grow, they often have wonderful ideas and opinions about limits. Parents can move from being caregivers to nurturers, to encouragers, then counselors. By involving them in discussions, parents are more likely to gain their children’s cooperation in following rules.

Children will try to test their limits to see how parents respond. It’s a crucial part of their development. In testing the limits, children are testing their parent’s love as well as their commitment to their word and rules. All children need the security of limitations to their behavior, while at the same time needing to grow and explore their world.

Dieting Linked to Smoking among Girls

While watching a classic film recently, it seemed that all the characters played by the actors were smoking cigarettes. Then I recalled that was indeed the way it used to be. And, although there are some movies and television programs that have gone back to having main characters smoking, it still is less prevalent than in the days before we learned how detrimental to health smoking really is.

The good news is that in about the past ten years, the percent of high school students in the U.S. who smoked regularly has dropped from about 35 to 23 percent – according to the Centers for Disease Control.


However, there are some teens who appear to be more at risk of picking up the bad habit. Recent research published in the American Journal of Health Promotion found that teenage girls who started diets were twice as likely to start smoking as their peers who did not diet.

Consistent with previous studies, the researchers found that dieting and weight concerns were not related to smoking among boys. Additionally, boys who were not overweight were more likely to try smoking, but were not as likely to smoke regularly.

The researchers suggested that health educators and practitioners should consider the link between initiation of dieting and regular smoking as they develop and use intervention and smoking prevention messages and programs. They also caution that parents need not panic if their child changes their diet. If, for example, your child begins eating healthier and more balanced meals, these changes should be celebrated as part of a healthier overall lifestyle.

Harry Potter- Good for Reading

Are you excited about the new Harry Potter movie? I am, but I usually read the books before I allow myself to see the movie. I’m a little behind on Deathly Hallows.

When you think of celebrities that are household names, you’re not likely to think of a fictional character – yet Harry Potter has certainly earned that distinction. And while the Harry Potter books and movies have catapulted to record-breaking success, even amid controversy, these books have also had another extraordinary effect on our youth. Harry Potter has stimulated an interest in reading among older children.

In a recent study conducted by the research firm Yankelovich and Scholastic Educational Publishers, children and their parents credited the Harry Potter series with getting more young people to read for fun and with helping them do better in school. Just more than half of the children between the ages of 5 and 17 claimed that they didn’t read books for fun before reading Harry Potter, and 65% reported they have been doing better in school since they started reading the Potter books.

Their parents were a little more enthusiastic, with 89% reporting their children showing an improved attitude toward reading, and 76% believing their children are doing better in school since starting to read the Potter books.

In the Kids and Family Reading Report, the researchers found that older children claimed that they don’t read for fun because they can’t find books that interest them. However, the Harry Potter books have garnered interest along all ages and have given many families books to enjoy together. This leads to improved attitudes toward reading.

Perhaps the magic of Harry Potter was equally powerful outside of the story, as the study shows that parents who want their children and teens to read may have found a spellbinding solution. Now I need to go find my daughter’s latest copy of Harry Potter!

Teenager's Internet Use

In my home, everyone uses the internet to get information for reports, the news, to shop, and to communicate with friends. We are fairly typical of families these days – in fact, more than half of American families with children now have Internet access.

While the Internet is a useful tool, it also poses challenges for parents who want to protect their children from inappropriate content.

In a recent study appearing in the Journal of Marriage and Family, researchers used data from a national survey of online teenagers and their parents to develop a profile of parents’ internal rule setting. Sixty percent of American parents with Internet access said that they regulate their teenager children’s Internet use by limiting the time they can spend online and by checking the Web sites their teens use. Another option is to install software to block questionable Web sites, and about 44% of parents reported using this option.

Parents who use the Internet with their teens are more likely to regulate Internet use, although older teens are less likely to have many rules.

You might be surprised that the research revealed that fathers are more likely than mothers to check the Websites their children visit and parents with lower education are more likely to put monitoring software on their home computers.

More information is needed to better understand the challenges of the Internet for families. But, understanding the opportunities and the risks of the Internet may help parents make decisions about the access they allow their teens.

The Protective Role of Grandparents

Being a grandparent today can mean many things. Many grandparents have a daily impact on their grandchildren because they live in the same household or they may be serving as surrogate parents. In fact, nearly 6% of children in the U.S. are now being raised by their grandparents.

These grandparents find themselves parenting their grandchildren when the adult child is unable to care for their own children and the grandparents step into help. Research tells us that grandparents are also the most willing of any family member to take grandchildren into their home.

Additionally, grandparents can affect grandchildren even when they don’t live under the same roof. Grandparents can make a difference “from a distance” by positively affecting a child’s development. Recent findings have shown that grandparents buffer the negative effects of high risk circumstances on children. For example, a grandchild’s sense of emotional closeness to, frequency of contact with, and their view of grandparents as a source of social support can buffer the negative effects of poverty and family stress.

The researchers also found that the closer grandchildren were to their grandparents, the less likely they were to be depressed as adults, particularly if their mother experienced depression during their childhood years.

As we can see, keeping children involved in their grandparent’s lives for the sake of Grandma and Grandpa is only part of the picture. These studies show that it certainly goes both ways! Grandparents are important in children’s lives, especially when facing difficult circumstances.